Gay Boy WarsCandle Wax and Ice Cubes
by Mitsukai Tacchi
Summary: Kibum needs to choose a boyfriend, so his best friends help him decide.  SHINee, OnKey, JongKey, JongYu, OnJongKey, Crack, Rated R.


Kim Kibum had a choice to make. Unfortunately for him, no matter which of his two options he considered, he couldn't seem to find the right answer. The reason was simple; his choice would affect both him and two of his best friends. Not only that, but he was sure that if he made a decision, he would always wonder if he made the right one or not. See, Kibum's choice wasn't a normal one; he doubted that many other people had been in the same situation. Kibum didn't have to choose something as simple as clothing, hair style, or dinner meal. He had to choose people…rather, he had to choose a boyfriend. Not having a boyfriend was simply not an option, and his two best options happened to be his best friends. The issue was that they both wanted Kibum, so the poor boy had to choose one or the other.

Something that made his decision a little easier was the fact that Kibum had dated both Jinki and Jonghyun, his two prospects, at earlier points in his life. Because of this, he knew each boy almost better than he knew himself. They were polar opposites. Perhaps this was why he was having such a hard time choosing. For every fault Jinki had, Jonghyun had a good quality to make up for it. However, the same thing worked in reverse. For everything Jonghyun did that pissed Kibum off, Jinki had something to make him feel better. Every time Kibum thought he had made up his mind, his mood would change and he would be right back to feeling indecisive again, carefully scrutinizing every quality of each prospect's personality.

Kibum's relationship with Jinki was much like a rated E for everyone fan-fiction. Everything was completely sweet and romantic. Jinki rarely made Kibum mad, and his utter clumsiness made Kibum's heart flutter. With Jinki, Kibum was rarely sad. Jinki was the type to make Kibum stand under an umbrella in the rain, clearly stating that the younger could get sick if he became wet, and not even think about the fact that he himself was getting drenched in the downpour. He would spontaneously surprise Kibum with roses or chocolates, leaving the younger boy feeling loved constantly. Then, when it came time to head to the bedroom, the fiction would trail off, leaving the next happenings to the reader's imagination. The problem here was simple. Jinki did all the rights things and acted the right way, but there was a certain spark missing. Their conversations were dull and boring, and they didn't always seem to have much in common. In short, Kibum got bored. They ended the relationship peacefully, and they were still best friends.

With Kim Jonghyun, on the other hand, there was never, never, never ever a dull moment. He was constantly sticking his hands in places they didn't belong, much to Kibum's approval. In fact, merely one night after they decided to start a relationship, Kibum found himself gagged, stripped, and handcuffed to a bed. He had oh-so fond memories of candle wax and ice cubes. To put it bluntly, Jonghyun was a freak in the sheets, and Kibum loved every minute of it. Outside of the bedroom, though, things weren't quite as marvelous. Jonghyun wasn't some kind of sex-crazed maniac that only wanted to get in Kibum's pants. Well, not _that_ much, anyway. He made sure to hold open doors, listen intently to Kibum's rants about shopping and cooking, and play nice boyfriend. It was just that he didn't have the ability to make Kibum feel quite as comforted as Jinki did. They fought frequently, and Kibum found himself in tears a few times a month. Too much excitement is never good for the soul; sometimes it needs a break, so that's what they did. As peacefully as with Jinki, Jonghyun and Kibum decided that it wasn't working out.

Things were absolutely fine until a few months later when the trio celebrated Kibum's birthday. Aside from them, two of their younger friends came to visit. Their names were Minho and Taemin, and they had no clue what chaos their picture perfect relationship would cause. After a night of sharing drinks, foods, and even chairs, the younger of the two, Taemin, fell asleep on the sofa. Minho was oh-so conveniently located beneath him, gently stroking the younger's hair and murmuring sweet nothings into his sleeping ears. Seeing this, Kibum, Jinki, and Jonghyun all had the startling realization that they were lonely.

Jinki's approach was extremely predictable. When Jonghyun slipped into the kitchen in search of alcohol, he casually slipped his hand into Kibum's. Slowly, nerves setting in, Jinki confessed that he still had feelings for the younger boy and that he wanted to try again. Kibum was taken off guard.

"I…" he started, unsure of how to answer at first. He still liked Jinki. In fact, he still liked him very much. Just by holding hands with the elder, his heart fluttered and his cheeks heated up. He pressed his lips together nervously and tensed his stomach. Warmth practically radiated from Jinki's broad, teddy-bear like body. In that moment, it seemed as if all of his troubles had gone away. If it weren't for the fact that he was afraid of rushing into anything that he would regret, he probably would have kissed the poor boy. Their friendship had survived one failed relationship, but would it survive two? Unfortunately, before he could even answer, Jonghyun burst into the room.

He was quiet enough to not wake Taemin, but loud enough to make Kibum flinch in surprise. "Hey, birthday boy," he drawled, grinning slyly and shaking two bottles of Moet Chandon. Kibum quickly rushed towards him and pushed him back into the kitchen. Jinki trailed behind.

"You're going to wake Taemin," he snapped, slapping Jonghyun across the chest.

"Nah, the kid is a heavy sleeper," Jonghyun replied, sticking out his tongue and not even wincing at the resounding blow to his over developed pectoral muscles. "Now, why don't you chillax, strip down to your birthday suit, and come join the after party. Location; the bedroom."

Yes, this was Jonghyun's way of asking Kibum out again. In the background, Jinki choked on a piece of chicken.

"You, sir, are incredibly crude," Kibum replied, narrowing his eyes. At the time, he had no idea what a dicey situation the troublesome trio had just entered.

The rest of his birthday was spent playing drinking games with his best friends. After they had become slightly drunk, Jonghyun, who had the greatest alcohol tolerance of them all, coaxed them into a game of strip poker. Miraculously, Jinki managed to keep most of his clothing. Kibum, however, was down to his pants in the first few hands. Jonghyun was almost naked ever quicker; it wasn't until later that Kibum realized he was losing on purpose.

By the end of the night, Jinki collapsed on a chair, still wearing his T-shirt and boxers. Kibum was barely coherent, so he hardly protested when Jonghyun began lazily lathering him up with whipped cream. He claimed that he was trying to pull a prank on him and had thought the younger to be asleep, before apologizing and quickly licking the white substance off of his naked chest.

Kibum slapped Jonghyun across the face moments before he slipped into a heavy slumber.

The next day, after all of his friends had gone home and his apartment was cleaned up, Kibum finally had time to think about the night's events. Through his blaring hang-over, he vividly remembered a hand down his pants at some point in the night. He would have to smack Jonghyun for that. What was more pressing on his aching mind, though, was that both Jonghyun and Jinki were trying to get his affection again…and…he didn't know who to date. With a sigh, he slipped back to the kitchen to find the left over alcohol.

Tension grew between the three. In the weeks after his birthday, Kibum noticed Jinki and Jonghyun growing increasingly bitter towards one another. Jonghyun was constantly cracking jokes about Jinki's lack of manhood, and Jinki was letting forth a never-ending stream of intelligent comebacks about Jonghyun's lack of brain.

Sometimes, Kibum would get in between the two. When Jonghyun told Jinki to grow some balls, Kibum told Jonghyun to grow a dick, adding that Jinki had an inch on him. When Jinki told Jonghyun he should stop drinking alcohol due to the fact that it significantly decreases the amount of brain cells a person possesses, adding that the brain does not regenerate cells and that Jonghyun did not have many to begin with, Kibum told him to him to choke on chicken.

As time passed, these conflicts began to grow worse. Jinki was becoming more possessive of Kibum, and Jonghyun became more possessive of Kibum's pants; rather, what was in them. They were simply not helping. Kibum was growing increasingly stressed out by the passing day. He knew that he needed to give the boys and answer; he felt like he was trapped in a sick game.

Finally, after a particularly harsh bout of gay boy war, Kibum found his solution. With hands hooked into claws, eyes as cold as ice, and a voice as forceful as he could muster, he gave them their answer. "If you are SO eager to have a boyfriend or a sex buddy, then, please, by all means, just FUCK EACH OTHER AND LEAVE ME OUT OF IT."

He turned away from the wide eyed faces of Jinki and Jonghyun, grabbed his keys, and stormed out his apartment door. Neither boy followed him; they were too stunned by Kibum's sudden outburst to even bother. Instead, they just looked at each other in shock.

"You know," Jonghyun started, lifting his fingers to stroke his lips thoughtfully.

"Don't. Even," Jinki snarled.

Jonghyun smirked.

After storming out, Kibum did what any other gay boy in a bad mood would do. He went to a gay bar.

The lights were a variety of rainbow colors, all dim, creating an oddly erotic aura. The dance floor was packed, full of sweaty bodies, most of them half naked. An upbeat song played through the tower of speakers by the DJ booth, but the bass was so loud that Kibum couldn't quite depict what it was. All he knew was that the sexy couple in the corner was grinding to the beat marvelously.

He was seated at the bar with his feet propped on either side of his stool, resting on some of the supporting bars so that his knees were propped apart. His head was bent forward, allowing his long bangs to cover his eyes. All that the bar tender could see of him were taught, prominent cheek bones and a set of lips that he quite wanted to try out. The collar of his leather jacket was turned up so that he looked even more guarded. The shaved side of his head gave him an even edgier appearance. However, this did nothing to stop the occasional man from trying to get in his pants. The fact that his jeans were from the women's department and extremely tight on his backside only encouraged them.

Sadly for him, no matter what he drank, who he told to "screw off," or how hard he banged his head onto the bar, he couldn't free his mind from his ever pressing dilemma. In the stupor of his drunkenness, the thought of just telling both boys no finally stumbled across his mind. '_What a silly idea,'_ he mused to himself, fingering the rim of his glass.

He was one drink away from an unwanted hand job when he finally made his way out of the bar. He lost count of how many hands grabbed his ass on the way, but it didn't bother him. He was in a gay bar, slightly drunk, and, if he did say so himself, a sexy Asian God man.

Kibum ended up taking the bus home, only because of the fact that he was too tipsy to drive. He'd be back in the morning to pick it up, so it was the farthest thing from his mind. By the time he finally arrived home, it was going on two in the morning. He wasted absolutely no time in clambering up the stairs to his fourth floor apartment and unlocking his door.

His apartment appeared clear. All mess and clutter had been cleaned up, probably thanks to Jinki, and his living room was completely vacant. He sighed in relief. The last thing he wanted to deal with at the moment was their immature fighting.

Kibum kicked off his shoes in the foyer before heading into his home. He left his keys on a small decorative table on his way to bed, and left his leather jacket lying in the middle of the floor. He was halfway done unbuttoning his shirt when he kicked open his bedroom door. There, he stopped.

Lying on his huge king sized bed were none other than Jinki and Jonghyun. Kibum's eyes were wide, and he tripped where the hard wood flooring ended and plush carpet began. Kibum's best friends were naked.

There was a silk sheet covering the two of them, but it left nothing to the imagination. Jonghyun was propped up against the cherry wood headboard. He had one leg propped up, and his arm was resting over his bare knee, his hand hanging limp in the air. Jinki was lying in a similar position, but he wasn't propped up against the headboard. No, his head was lying quite comfortably on Jonghyun's chest. He was seated on the bed directly between Jonghyun's legs.

Casually, as if it were no big deal, Jonghyun was stroking Jinki's hair, occasionally getting rid of a small knot or two. There was a content smile on his lips, one that Kibum knew well.

"You didn't," he gasped, staring bewildered at the pair on _his_ bed. He knew without a doubt what they had done, though. Their naked chests were shiny with remnants of sweat. Near Jinki's belly button, Kibum spied a few streaks of red, mixed in with a very, very suggestive white substance. At this point, he noticed the candles set on his end table.

Jonghyun looked up, and Jinki seemed to wake up. Jinki's smile was sheepish, but Jonghyun's was quite, quite conceited.

"I wasn't serious!" Kibum gasped. His eyes were still raking every inch of the scene in front of him. In a few moments time, he had to grasp the door frame. His tight pants did not bode well with his sudden excitement, and the discomfort was evident in his startled face.

"Kibum, love," Jinki started, pressing his lips together. "Well, Jonngie and I both knew that you were stressed out, so…so…we thought we'd try and solve this predicament for you."

Kibum just stared wide-eyed, unsure of how to react.

Jonghyun tilted his head to the side. He lifted his chin slightly, and his eyes met Kibum's, giving him a look that said it all. He winked.

"Kibum, you seem to be a little excited there. Care to join us?"


End file.
